The November chill has officially arrived in Seattle, and there was even a winter storm warning for the Cascade Mountains over the past few days! The autumn leaves in my neighborhood are still hanging onto the branches, but a good deal of them are now a crunchy blanket over the sidewalk and street. Fall is my favorite season, having grown up in the Great Lakes where autumn is simply stunning…and it’s pretty nice here in the Pacific Northwest, too. But this year, along with the admiration of the natural changes of the season, I have to admit some trepidation and anxiety as we near what Seattleites call “The Big Dark” or “the dark wet,” the cold and damp season of unceasing rain-mist. (Not to mention, COVID-19 rates are reaching the highest ever, in Washington state and across the country.)

I know I am not alone in this worry about what to do to steward my (and others’!) physical, mental and emotional health during the winter when indoor gatherings are not wise due to COVID, and outdoor gatherings are hampered by weather. And…let’s just be honest, there’s a LOT of Zoom-fatigue out there, too.

First, I’ll say that I believe in the power and efficacy of therapy for everyone. And especially right now. And so please, please, please reach out to a counseling service or ask your pastor for a referral if you even have an inkling that you could use some extra support. After 8+ months of limiting social gatherings and travel and seeing loved ones, this country and the world as a whole have unprecedented levels of pandemic trauma and grief. We are not in the same boat, as some people have been saying since March, but we are in the same storm…and support is important to survival. So please seek out mental health resources, and encourage your loved ones to seek help as well.

Second, I’ll share my personal thoughts and plan for keeping up my spirit during this time. This is not to say what works for me will work for you, or this is the only way or the “right” way to live through this winter as fully as possible, but just to maybe spark your imaginings of how you could care for yourself. And clergy—I love y’all so much. Please make sure you are taking your time off and stewarding your self-care. And parishioners—I love y’all so much. Please make sure your clergy is taking their time off—and consider giving them more!

This is what I’ve committed to doing:

• working out. Strength training 2x/week, cardio at least 2x/week. Hopefully the gym I attend will continue to be open (with appropriate COVID protocols). I have also found some dri-fit long-sleeve shirts on Poshmark and Amazon so I can (attempt to) run/walk outside.

• spiritual direction. I try to do monthly spiritual direction. My spiritual director listens with me and accompanies me through processing situations in my life and ministry. This helps me stay well so I can work with others.

• therapy. Yep! I meet with a counselor on a regular basis. 100% recommend.

• hobbies. I craft—I knit and crochet, and since the pandemic began, I’ve picked up embroidery. If you have the means, I recommend trying a kit! If you’ve been thinking, “wow, I wish I knew how to do [A CRAFT]”, this is the time! Etsy has some sweet options, so treat yourself to learning something new!

  • here’s a great embroidery kit I gave my friend for her birthday this year! She said it was bee-eautiful (get it?!) And here’s another one local to the PNW!

  • here’s a punch needle kit my friend loved!

  • I really want to do needle felting as my next kit, so here’s the shop I’m considering—join me?

• virtual socials. Yes, I know we’re on Zoom literally ALL.THE.TIME. But some of these gatherings can be really good for the soul. You can keep it short (set a time limit!) and gather for a theme (game night! baking together! coffee date! storytime!)

  • Jackbox games is really cool and my family has been using them since about May, after my dad learned how to use Zoom :)

  • Have a party! My birthday is coming up in December and I, obviously, won’t be having an in-person gathering. But I am going to try to do something online! What that will be, I’m not sure, but I know it will be good to see my loved ones, even in this form! And Etsy has some cool options for party kits you can send to loved ones, too!

  • dance party. Play a Spotify playlist, share the computer sound on Zoom and dance your heart out! I did this for 1.5 hours with some friends recently and it made me SO happy!

• get outside. If the weather permits, I highly encourage you to get outside. Since many of us are hanging out at home instead of jetting off to conferences and family events, we have an opportunity to really be present in our geographical location. And, bonus, outside activities offer options for social distancing! Is there a place in your state you want to visit in the great outdoors—do it! Change your scenery!

• embrace your senses.

  • Snuggle a human or a pet in your household bubble.

  • Buy yourself flowers at the grocery store, or get them delivered for no reason (or a special occasion!)

  • Put on perfume just for you (this has been an absolute delight for me! I got my first perfume ever that I picked out!)

  • Eat so your body feels good. That’s different for everyone, and that’s ok! Sometimes when I’m sad or lonely I forget to make meals…but I am doing my best to do some meal planning so I can keep a regular schedule.

  • Go ahead and put up your Christmas decorations—just do it! It’s ok! (Anita of yesteryear would have felt a liiiiiiiittle judgey about this, but whatever! If decorations bring you joy, put them up!)

  • Wear clothes that you love and make you feel good.

• practice hospitality. I know…this is weird. But I honestly didn’t realize that I was trying to fill this gap in my life until I met with my spiritual director today! I said I’d baked cookies for my brother, grandma, uncle and boyfriend’s parents; written letters and sent encouraging stickers to kids and youth in my congregation as well as family and friends; crocheted and crafted and knitted and embroidered for a lot of holiday gifts; and had several “virtual spa nights” with friends (paint your own nails, do a face mask, drink something yummy and check-in)…and my spiritual director said “that sounds like you are creating virtual hospitality and caring for people by letting them know they are loved and making space for them to be their whole selves.” And, as usual, she had a great point! That’s exactly what I was trying to do! So whatever you miss about providing hospitality for folks, try something new—and let me know how it goes!

These aren’t huge things, I know. And I probably sound like a broken record from other posts…but I am seeing a lot of posts about loneliness and isolation and the extended social distancing guidelines (and, here in Washington, we start another shutdown tonight at midnight). And I want YOU to take care of YOU (and any other humans and pets you are caring for as well). Though this is sometimes a reminder I need to hear from others (and I welcome you to remind me!), put on your oxygen mask before assisting others.

If you are struggling, reach out. If you are anxious, express your worries to a trusted loved one or a professional. If you are sad, let others accompany you. You are worth it. You are loved. We will get through this…apart, but together.

Let’s chat.

How are you planning for the winter? What are some strategies you’re interested in trying? What would you add to this list?

All of us have missed some big life event due to COVID-19 and taking safety measures seriously. Feel free to name what you are grieving as well.

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